Searching for love, I found the path to freedom.
Learning how to be free was the first step in learning to know love.
-Bell Hooks
Healing in Relationship
There are many myths about finding love—largely built on the belief that it will save us or make us feel whole. In reality, looking for love outside of ourselves is only temporary, and continuing to seek love externally leaves many heartbroken and unfulfilled. Real relationships are messy, growth is painful, and many feel confused about why they’re not happy, even though they have everything. It’s easy to think you’re not in the right relationship—which may be true. It may also be that you’re looking to your relationship to fulfill something inside you.
Healing in relationship means building intimacy that fosters the security and space needed to grow together—to learn what it means to love and be loved, even when it challenges you. Because relationships evoke our deepest wounding, they are powerful vessels of transformation. The goal of this work is to utilize the power of relationships to restore connection and catalyze healing.
Self Awareness
Relationships shine a light on a hidden place inside that wants to feel safe, loved, and accepted. This place has roots that stretch all the way back to our childhood. We run into challenges in relationships when we unconsciously seek love from this place, looking to fill an old void. When you don’t feel loved by your partner it unconsciously brings up past hurt, leading to destructive patterns that perpetuate familiar cycles of pain and isolation.
It’s easy to find fault in yourself and your partner, in an attempt to understand the pain. Growth asks you turn inward and feel into the deeper truth inside. Holding this space for one another is the gift of being in a healing relationship. When you find the courage to acknowledge the longing for love and safety living in the heart of conflict, you create a relationship that supports growth. When there’s a true recognition of self and other—not in opposition but of two people seeking the same love—warmth and compassion flow easily.
Deeper Intimacy
A life lived in hiding is a life held captive by fear. Fear creates contraction and distance—the result is a relationship that lacks vitality and undermines growth. Healing in relationship means choosing to step into the unknown together—to take the risk of opening your heart and speaking your truth, to develop real intimacy.
The more you come out, and risk being seen, the more you feel the joy of being yourself and truly knowing your partner. This kind of intimacy is raw, playful, and organic. As new ways of being together emerge there’s room for imperfection and learning, for conflict and connection to coexist. Healing love blossoms when you and your partner come into your naturalness—a way of being that makes choosing your relationship clear and effortless.
